6 Steps to Control Your Disappointment

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Disappointment is apparently the third most common emotion that is experienced by us mere mortals. In case you’re interested, it comes behind the classics, love and regret. Any of you that share my love for sport will have grown used to regular disappointment, and you must also know how that then affects your mood afterwards. How about your decision-making?

The attached article explains much more about how I come to know this information, it is not that I have personally gone round the worlds population and asked everyone. Instead it is all very scientific, and clever people with white coats and brain scanners have sorted it all out.

The conclusion to the findings is rather interesting and also very practical to apply. It offers 6 pearls of wisdom that will help a person to control their own disappointment, and actually as a person that often feels disappointed due to expecting far too much out of life, I think they are pretty good. So here they are:

Try a bit of “retroactive pessimism” Social psychologists have identified what they call a “hindsight bias” in which you can limit their disappointment by revising the high expectations you once had for winning. Tell yourself you didn’t really expect to win, and as time goes by, the new memory will replace the painful, original memory.

Increase your disappointment tolerance. There’s no reason that people low in disappointment tolerance have to remain that way forever. Don’t let disappointment breed pessimism because if you do, you’re likely to set yourself up for even more disappointment in the future.

Don’t let disappointment skew your economic decisions. When you’re feeling disappointed, you’re more likely to sell at a loss. So if your favorite sports team lost the championship, don’t rush to dump your treasure chest full of memorabilia onto eBay.

Assess your role in personal disappointments. Though you can’t control the outcome of a playoff game (despite your superstitious beliefs), you can control many of the outcomes in your personal life. If your expectations in love and work chronically fail to materialize, make an honest appraisal of what you may need to change in yourself.

Control your identification with a losing cause. The sports fans who feel the most let down are the ones who identify most strongly with their teams. There’s nothing wrong with being loyal, but if it impairs your daily happiness, you need to find other ways to boost your spirits such as strategy #6.

Use humor to boost your emotions. Loyal sports fans who retain their loyalty despite years of punishing outcomes almost seem to relish their identification with the underdog. If lowering your identification with your hometown heroes isn’t an option, try joining the ranks of your fellow sufferers who find solace in self-deprecating humor. Laughter is truly one of the best coping strategies and by allowing you to retain your optimism, can offset the consequences of faulty pessimism-based decisions.

Ultimately, achieving your goals is the best way to avoid disappointment. However, when those goals remain out of reach, these six steps will help you manage your feelings effectively.

Here is the full article

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201204/disappointed-six-ways-recover-emotional-setbacks

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