There is a quote that I remember, “he who has the most flexibility controls the system,” and this refers to the strength of being able to move with the flow. It is so important to be able to accept events for what they are and change and adapt to the new situation that has developed. Stress is caused and endures by the situation changing and the person remaining where they are. An old Buddhist teaching explains, “be like the river rather than the rock”.
In a village many years ago, a wild horse was going bananas in the middle of the main street that linked the eastern side of the village to the west. This street was the main thoroughfare that all of the villagers used to get to the market and back. On this day they were all crowded together watching the horse and panicking that they would not be able to get to market. They had been there for hours, and if anything the horse was getting worse. One man suggested that they fetch old Ben the village elder who would surely know a way of getting past the horse. Perhaps he would know how to calm the wild horse down and lead it back out to the edge of the village. When old Ben came and looked at the horse, he simply turned around and walked off in the other direction. When someone asked him where he was going, he simply said, “I’m just going to walk down another road to the market instead.”
There is a massive strength in accepting the way things are and changing the way you think about them. By not doing this you invite the stress to control you. Don’t kid yourself that you are in control of anything in life anyway.
A recent study from Dr Mostofsky from Harvard Medical School showed that the way a person responds in the day following the bereavement of a spouse can offer a 21 times increase in the potential risk of having a heart attack. Stress is related to all aspects of life, and some people experience severe stress in their career or in the death of a loved one, perhaps divorce or moving house, but everyday stress is also bad for you too.
Stress is like the arch enemy of well-being. When a person is not being well, they are being stressed about something. Stress happens when things happen that are different to the norm, or out of a persons perceived control. It is a natural response that happens when your mind is attempting to rationalise events and put them back in order.
You often find that a person that shows a stress response in everyday life will usually be the one that experiences high levels of stress when the big things come along. Heart disease is completely influenced by stress, and research has proved this time and time again. Those that live to older ages are the ones that can control the amount of stress that they suffer from.
There are ways to reduce the amount of stress that you experience and if you are one of those people that is always stressed, flustered and panicked then you really need to do something about it. There are so many health effects that are caused by stress that doing something about it is as important to you as putting your broken arm in a sling. Remember you can’t control life but you can control the way that you deal with it.
Get in touch with clear lantern and talk to me about how I can help you to a happier, stress-free life.